What I got for Trying

This year has been trying. I really thought I had something going. I found a new doctor who had new ideas, and we tried some of them. I took drugs to kill the mold living in my gut. I lived with the painful side effects of the mold toxins in my nervous system (when mold dies, it releases mold toxins or “mycotoxins” as a last hurrah). I found some supplements that really helped with the energy issue and my inability to sleep on a normal schedule. I even found one that helped with my food allergies and low blood pressure. I hoped, even allowed myself to believe that I could possibly be on a path to a cure.

I had one amazing week this year. We went to Maui with some friends. Every day of that trip I felt better and better, with the fog clearing from my brain. I was able to get up early every day. I was able to swim long distances to snorkel with very little exertion. It was almost like I wasn’t sick. When I got a serious gluten exposure, the supplements effectively mitigated the worst of the bad effects.

I started to engage in activities like I wasn’t sick. I started working with a physiotherapist on some exercises to stop my back from hurting. I invested more energy into Kitty Mine Crafts because I could. I started making plans to travel to Europe next year. I was finally going to not be sick anymore.

A little bit after my birthday, I saw a friend who had a small, but lingering cold. She told me she wasn’t contagious anymore, because it had been weeks. I laughed, telling her not to underestimate my ability to catch her cold. I thought I was kidding. I really did.

About 48 hours later, I felt like I had a light cold. I worried a bit, but I thought that maybe I had done enough to reset my immune system, to get it acting properly. I took the right vitamins. I rested, because I wanted to give my body its best chance to heal.

After a few days, I wasn’t better. My cold symptoms were gone, but I felt like I did three years ago when I found myself all but confined to my couch for a year. It was a little better this time, because I knew about my soy allergy, so my brain wasn’t on fire. I also have this whole fiber business going on, so I had things I could do from my sofa other than watching television. I made friends with a few video games I had been neglecting in my health. I thought I could overcome this by doing all the right things.

Then days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into two months. I’m better than I was on the first day, but right now, I have pretty firm limits. I thought, though, that my new doctor could help me recover faster. That it wouldn’t have to be a full year, or even another month of this.

When I told him I relapsed, he decided it would be a good opportunity to redo the echo and MRI I had done two years ago. He thought we’d see something because I was freshly into an active stage of the disease. Except it came back like I told him, all clean, save for something called a T2 prolongation in the white matter of my brain. It apparently has grown since it was last noted. All either of us knows about it is that these things can come up after an infection of some sort (autoimmune or viral) has crossed into the brain. It’s associated with migraines, MS, and vascular dementia. But that’s it.

He had me schedule another appointment a month later. When I hadn’t somehow remitted, he told me the most devastating thing he could have. He said that we had reached the limits of his education, and he couldn’t do anything else for me. He said he knew how to remove road blocks to healing, and he thought he had removed all of mine. He said that now it’s about convincing my body to heal, and he doesn’t know how to do that. He said my answers would not come from the medical field, but from diet and nutrition. He told me to comb the alternative disciplines for answers. The bottom line is, he left me out here on my own.

We discussed what I was going to do. I told him that I hadn’t been able to get out of the house for long because I couldn’t walk far or stand in line, and you do a lot of that at Christmas. He offered to do his part to get me a handicap parking permit. I invested in a cane that has a folding seat attached so I can stand in long lines (I find it preferable to a chair, which I don’t really feel I need). I even talked to a friend about coming to work for me as a part time personal assistant. All accommodations I didn’t want to make, but I feel I have to now. Because I can’t count on getting better.

See, at that appointment, a little more of my hope died. I thought if I kept at it, if I kept trying, I could get better. I mean, that’s what so many people say about ME/CFS – that we’re not trying hard enough, and if we did, we would get better. We have to want it. For some unknowable (to me) reason, I let those notions linger in my thoughts. Well, I do want it. And I have tried harder than anyone I know to not be sick. After years of trying, I got better for a week. One amazingly well-timed week. Then I was having trouble recovering from the trip, and then I caught a cold. And then I ended up disabled. I’m not sure these things are unrelated.

If trying got you better, I would be the healthiest person in the world. I watch my diet so carefully. I ask questions and tell people who really have no business knowing that I need them to be careful how they handle my food. I explored new treatments and I endured grueling side effects (seriously, the mycotoxins lit every nerve of my body on fire, and I thought that death would have been a kinder fate). I took medications that wiped out large portions of my days. I take pills all the time to sleep and stay awake at normal hours. I read every label on everything I touch. I do all of this, and I’m not better.

I hate that I’ve caved and started making accommodations for the ME/CFS. The fact that I’ve done this means that I’m accepting this is here for the long term. My doctors are telling me that this is real, and any hope I had of this being a psychosomatic thing I could cure just by wanting it to go away is gone. I’m sick, for real. This is going to be my life. The worst part is, when I give something up temporarily, it seems like I never get it back. Temporary seems to be what I tell myself to get through the transition from being able to do something myself to losing that ability.

I know that this sounds pretty dark. It is pretty dark. I’m mourning a loss. Along with my hope, the person I was going to be died. The person who is here now is different – not necessarily worse, and possibly even better. The future I was envisioning with world travel and a big important career is gone. The new future is not what the person I was wanted. I’m going to try to make it what the new person I am will want, though.

I only have vague notions of what my future is going to have in it. Several of my doctors have asked if I would please consider medical school, given that I have the intelligence and life experience that could really change other people’s life. I have to get to a certain point in healing before I can do that, though. I can’t read for long anymore. I can barely write without breaking it into several short sessions because the required focus wears me out. My memory is good long-term, but the short term memory is nothing short of terrible. I forget sentences I uttered just moments before. These are not conducive to intense study.

I’m not sure about how travel will go. I can’t enjoy Europe as I am right now. I can’t walk far, and getting the gear I need that far across the world would be hard. And let’s not forget the flight – the security procedures have become so terrible for me that the last time I flew, I completely broke down emotionally. The seats themselves generate pain on short flights. I’d be debilitated by the time I landed on a longer flight. I know I can fly within the US, but I think I’m going to have to cut back again. And I still can’t travel during the holiday and flu season.

I think I’m going to keep up with my wool business. I like that work, and it’s something I can do when I can’t be up for long stretches. And I made some great friends that way – I think that there are more friends out there that I just haven’t met yet.

I have a feeling that fostering will become an even smaller part of my life. I mean, with a personal assistant to help me, it should be more manageable, but I don’t know how I’ll manage to put my personal touch on the kittens if I am less involved.

So, yeah, that’s where I am. A lot sicker and quite lost. I haven’t given up entirely, but it’s an attractive option. Until then, I’ll keep trying.

All the Rest

This week, I’m resting. It’s not something I like to do, but it’s something I understand I must do. In just about two weeks, my brother and his family are coming out for Christmas. I am utterly thrilled about this, but I have to prepare. Preparing for me is not like it is for most people. For most, it’s about cleaning the house and decorating to make the guests feel like it’s really Christmas! For me, it’s about storing as much energy as I can so that I can actually enjoy visiting people who I don’t get to see often enough. The house will be clean(ish). There will be some decoration (Michael put Christmas lights on the outside of our house for the first time ever!). It just won’t be up to the standards I would like. But my guests will understand.

Resting this week means that I am not going to any appointment outside of my house. It doesn’t mean that I won’t leave the house at all, it just means that I have the luxury of doing it if and when I feel up to it. The problem with my appointments is that I have to go at the time scheduled, but sometimes I feel sick and really wish I could stay home instead (and this includes fun things like knit night). The stress of the whole thing makes it so I use more energy than I might otherwise. I will have none of that this week. I am still going to work, but that’s easy enough because again, I can do it on my own time. I build in 3 days to my expected ship date to account for such things as “I don’t feel well enough to make the 2-minute drive the the post office and Michael is out of town and can’t drop it off for me.” The people who ask me for custom jobs give me a long enough lead time that I can easily meet their expectations. I have no worries about this.

This time, I’m a little more at peace with the idea that I have to rest. I still don’t like it, mind you, but I have found something that makes this need acceptable in my world. I got the testing back from Dr M, and finally, I look sick on paper. I’m sick enough that a pure medical doctor could see it. I’m in late stage adrenal failure. My acupuncturist doesn’t like the word “failure” to describe the condition, but I call it like I see it. My adrenal glands cannot keep up with the stress on my body, and they are now failing to do their job. I don’t judge them for it, I just know they can’t keep up.

Don’t get too excited that I finally have a diagnosis. I don’t. This is just like the ME/CFS diagnosis – adrenal failure is a symptom, not the disease. This also isn’t to be confused with Addison’s disease. As I understand it, Addison’s is usually autoimmune, with a few cases being about traumatic or congenital damage to the adrenal glands, and this is the primary disease. My adrenal glands are not damaged, they’re just overworked. The catch is, we need to find out why my adrenal glands are working too hard. There is some stressor hiding and completely overtaking my body. I have no evidence of infection or parasites. I am not emotionally stressed. I don’t seem to be having any more food reactions. It’s important to figure this out because adrenal insufficiency is life threatening.

Dr M was surprised when none of his testing showed a cause for the adrenal insufficiency. He was sure I had a parasite or infection that was just overlooked by my previous doctors. On the bright side, when the testing came back, he acknowledged that I am not an easy case, that I don’t fit into one of his boxes, and that I am really, really sick.

I have a theory about the biggest contributing factor to the adrenal problem. I think it’s my heart. I think that when I have low blood pressure and my heart tries to race to keep up with my cardiac output needs (a function powered by adrenaline), it puts demands on my adrenal glands that I can’t keep up with. I think that the dizzy spells I have been experiencing in the last few weeks are due to the fact that my body just can’t keep up, and it can’t get blood to my brain. I am going to mention this to Dr M the next time I see him. My next appointment is going to be after Christmas. He wants to retest and see if he can find parasites or infections that he can treat. We’re doing a protocol right now that should coax out anything hiding. If he doesn’t find something, I think that my theory should be explored. I am feeling more and more that my primary problem is cardiac output. If you don’t have enough blood circulation, it suppresses the immune system, makes you tired, and causes stress. Cardiomyopathy (or more particularly, whatever caused it) is very likely the root cause of my condition.

So, now that we’ve covered the technical stuff, let’s move on to the fun things!

I’m still doing well with my shop. I am growing quickly, and I’ve inquired with a wholesaler about forming a relationship so I can carry a larger variety of things in my shop! One thing I want in particular is commercially dyed wool so I can better fill these sampler packs I developed:

Wool Paint Sampler for Felting or Spinning - Hand dyed Merino Wool Roving in Flower Colors

I got the idea from these really cool felted paintings I’ve seen on Etsy. I realized that the people who make this art view wool like paint. I actually picked up needle felting supplies so I could try to make things like this – not that I have that level of skill,  but I can create simple things. I’m working on Christmas themed felt coasters right now. They look a little primitive, but skill takes time to develop.

I’ve also been making new cat toys. It helps that I have kittens to demo the products – I feel like this is a win for everyone involved. I get to test the toys on the kittens to make sure they are something cats actually want to play with, I get pictures of kitties actually using my toys so people can see that real cats like the toys, and the kittens get a little exposure (I mention in my listings that the kittens will be up for adoption, and if someone wants to pursue the adoption I can send them to the shelter to see if they are a good match).

I just developed “Kitty Fusilli”…

Cat Toy - Set of 3 Kitty Fusilli - Wool/ Cotton/ Silk/ NylonCat Toy - Set of 3 Kitty Fusilli - Wool/ Cotton/ Silk/ Nylon

and August helped me demo them! He was such a good sport with my toys.

I also got a few shots of the crocheted ring toys, again with August demonstrating how fun they are!

Cat Toy - Set of 3 Crochet Ring Toys for Cats - Wool/Cotton/synthetic Fibers - 2-inch Plastic RingKitty Toy Bliss

I love that last shot of August! He doesn’t always have his eyes crossed, I just think the toy was so close up that he had trouble focusing! He just looks so silly-happy about his toy!

August came to me about a week ago with his mother and three brothers. We have Snow, Mr Gold, Cricket, Charming, and August.

Snow Unnamed boy1 Unnamed boy2 Unnamed boy3 Unnamed boy4

With a little help from my friends on Facebook, we chose a “Once Upon a Time” theme for this little family.

I am working on getting adoption portraits for the kittens. The above picture of Snow is my choice for her at this moment. I have a series of pictures of Mr Gold, and I think that the last one might be his adoption portrait:

Mr Gold's toy 1 Mr Gold's toy 2 Mr Gold's toy 3 Mr Gold's toy 4 Mr Gold's toy 5

 

I have one more great picture from our play sessions, but this one isn’t useful for adoption.

Duck's Kitten

Duck strikes again, absolutely loving the foster kittens as if he were their mother – see his smile? I can’t say enough about how great Duck is with the kittens. He plays with them and grooms them as if they were his.

So, for having to deal with less than ideal circumstances, I’m doing all right. And for now I’m going to rest, knowing that I’m doing the best I can.

Shameless Plug for Kitty Mine Crafts

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just in case you were interested. I haven’t forgotten about the blog, and in fact, I have news. Unfortunately, the news will have to wait while I work on my shop and go to my appointments. Click on the picture. I hope you like what you see.

As Good as I Hoped… Almost

The last couple of weeks have been eventful, and almost everything has been going as well (or even better) than I hoped. My shop is exactly where I wanted it to be much faster than I expected. This week I have gotten sales on most days. I thought I was going to reach fifty items in my inventory for sale, but things are going slightly faster than I can replace them. This is fine. I don’t need the inventory, I was trying to drive business. There is a minimum number of listings that makes the shop appealing to buyers – they get drawn in by a listing, then look around to see if there is something they like better or want to add to the item that drew them in. If there isn’t enough, they leave or just buy the one thing. When there are more listings, there are more purchases. I thought the magic number was going to be one hundred, but it seems the number is actually forty-six (but I wish it were forty-two).

I realized that I needed to add more inventory in a hurry, so on Wednesday this week I dyed a bunch of new rovings (the first one isn’t listed yet)…

..and then I had a dying accident. That pumpkin orange you see on the right was going to be a first attempt at the candy corn color in the middle. I mix the dyes in a glass jar because if I pour boiling water in a plastic bottle, the bottle melts. I can use a warm dye, but I can’t move it to the squeeze bottle until it cools nearly all the way. In any case, I had my rubber gloves on and was carrying the jar of dye over to the undyed roving, when the jar slipped and broke. Plenty of the dye went into the roving, so I just went with that. Plenty more got on my countertop (fortunately, it’s a silestone counter and the dye comes out with Dawn, vinegar, and a long scrub with a magic eraser), a fair amount ended up in the utensil drawers in my kitchen island, and a little ended up on the floor. I also splashed some onto my dish towel, so I tried (and failed) to even out the color. The worst is that my tennis shoes are partly orange as well. 😦

I’ve made it my policy to limit my listings to one new item per day. There is a really good reason for this. If I list or relist something daily, it helps my visibility. I do not like the idea of paying another listing fee for something that doesn’t need it, so I just stick to new listings as often as possible. I can only work so much before I am exhausted (and not at all on Tuesdays when I have acupuncture, massage and bowling – too many scheduled events leave me overwhelmed). The photography and listing are very time consuming, and I like to have some photographed items ready for days when I really just can’t put in much effort at all. The problem is, I really don’t like to have a list of things that need to be done. I learned in college what it felt like to not procrastinate, and man, the feeling was so good that I have given up the sport of procrastination entirely. Well, almost entirely. In this case, it’s better not to just get it all done at once.

Health has actually factored in to my work lately. I have known for the last nine years that if I work too many hours (what constitutes too many varies from day to day), I pay for it inordinately. I try to limit myself, but I really like working, especially at this job. I put in nineteen hours a day the first few days, then maybe twelve hours the rest of the first few weeks, then eight from then on. The work was huge at first because I had to set up a Facebook page, create a Twitter account, make a Ravelry group, become on official yarn brand and shop on Ravelry, and read and implement what I learned about marketing and Search Engine Optimization (SEO).

I started to feel the impact of my activity pretty quickly. The first few days were ok, but the ME/CFS often has a delayed onset – I do something today and pay for it a few days later. I get tired, and the fibromyalgia pain acts up. I think what really happens is that stress hormones over-activate my nervous system, and then all the bad things come up. I started having more problems with my POTS, becoming breathless when simply standing up. I was also having insomnia and nightmares (from adrenaline surges at night) – first the scary vampires-chasing-me kind, then the soul crushing defeat that leaves me waking up in tears kind. This is the heart of what took me out when I got sick two and half years ago (can you believe it’s been that long? and also that short?).

The disabling fatigue is actually easier to handle this time, for many reasons. The most important reason, as far as I’m concerned, is that I am not also dealing with the brain-burn from the undetected soy and estrogen sensitivity I had the first time. The brain-burn can take me out on its own, and with the post-exertional malaise, well, it’s catastrophic. Another reason I’m finding it easier is that Dr B has an idea of what might have led to it. You see, I did another gallbladder cleanse a couple of weeks ago. I was gaining weight even though I had not changed my diet (about fifteen pounds in 3 months). Dr B thought I might have been holding on to hormones, so I took calcium d-glucarate to help my liver process them out. Well, it stopped the weight gain, but didn’t really lead to the weight going back to where it was. Through some testing, we learned that my gallbladder/biliary pathways are under-functioning, so the cleanse was supposed to clean it out and help it start over. For the week after the cleanse, I was rapidly losing weight (a pound a day). This is exactly what happened before I fell off a cliff those years ago. Dr B’s theory is that the hormones that I was storing as fat became water soluble from the cleanse, and that I was reabsorbing toxic hormones that were, in effect, poisoning me. I think he’s right. I am still taking the calcium d-glucarate to support hormone detox, but there isn’t much I can do about the toxic dose of whatever was stored in my fat cells. Just wait it out, I guess. What’s good is that I have a very viable answer, and this gives me hope that I can heal some and that I can prevent this level of function loss in the future.

Now don’t mistake me – I will never be cured. I’m always going to be prone to developing these symptoms if I overdo it or lose weight too quickly. But I know so much more about exactly what’s wrong and how to minimize the impact of the ME/CFS on my life than I did when this first happened, and more than I did even when I finally found the diagnosis a year and a half ago. I’m still not going to realistically be able to work in a full-time job outside of the home. But this is the dream, isn’t it? To work for yourself in a job that you love, when you want and how you want? It’s almost what I hoped for in my life. I could live without the chronic illness, but I can’t have everything.

I’m working all the time

I’ll admit, I had no idea what I was getting into when I decided to open Kitty Mine Crafts. I spend far more time on photography and marketing than I do making the yarn and fiber stuff that I sell. I am at this all hours of the day. It’s a lot of work. Work I love, but nonetheless, work.

The thing is, when I put this much time into something, it wears me out. Not like a normal person – I mean, I end up spending more time lying down than I would like. Sleeping in the middle of the day. Despite that, I am happy to be working. People who have commented on my shop in person have simply gushed over it. I feel like I’m doing a good job. I get lots of views and likes on my page, but not many sales. My next task is just that – figuring out how to land that sale after a person looks at my listing.

I’ve mentioned the concept of how my energy works before (the spoons story). Well, in order to spend my spoons on the job, I had to give up something. First, I gave up one of my chiropractic adjustments each week. This was possible because I am taking a new supplement, Calcium D-Glucarate, that is helping A LOT. It lowers estrogen levels, in turn lowering inflammation levels for me since I seem to have a bad reaction to estrogen (hard to get away from it when you’re female, or I’d just avoid it). I then moved my acupuncture to every other week. This might be a mistake because she does a lot more for me, including something called “interferential therapy,” which had been helping the pain levels some. I can’t eliminate the massage – I think I’d die of pain and inability to move. I know I need to eliminate more, but that will solve itself some when a coursera class I am taking, Gamification, is over with. I’ll be taking more classes in the future, but I’ll get a break for a little while. I might have to adjust my participation level as well – you can just listen to lectures, or, if you do the work, can earn a certificate. I like earning certificates. Makes me feel smart. And finally, I’ve neglected the blog again. I really want to keep up with it, especially since I’ve improved my photography. The kittens photograph so well!

As long as I don’t give up too much in the health care realm, I think I can continue to work hard on my business. Here is a small sample of things I’ve made in the last few weeks:

Half and Half Orange and Black

In case you’re wondering, no, I haven’t started using a light box – I just photograph right in my back yard. The lighting is great for that here in Colorado. I’ve reached a level with my photography that is good enough for my business. The pictures aren’t the best of all the listings, but they are better than most. It really isn’t reasonable for me to reach a level of skill that could be considered professional. If that were the case, I’d be selling my pictures instead.

My shop has had some success thus far. There is a group called “The Handmade Movement” who sneak attack newer Etsy shops. That is, they form a cash mob and buy a bunch of your inventory in order to give your business a boost. The people were incredibly nice – I recommend you go join them if you want to commit philanthropic acts on new, handmade products businesses. One of them even blogged about the event! I’ve not had any sales since, but I fully expect to do so in the future. I think I’ve done well for a shop that has only been open two months. I think the holidays will help, too.

I have no new kittens at the moment because we were traveling. Last week, Michael and I went to Boston, then drove to see Sara. I love visiting her – she and I have so much in common. If I had my act together, I could have joined her at a craft fair she was doing that weekend. She makes these great baby blankets – I might have even purchased one to give as a gift to another friend who really appreciates handmade things.

I returned the kittens to the shelter before we left. They should all be adopted by now. These are the pictures I gave the shelter for their profiles (far better than the ones they started with, I assure you):

 

You’d never guess if you didn’t know, but Marie and Lamarck, the two on the bottom, had eye infections when I first got them. Their eyes were so infected that the shelter vets thought they might have to take them out. I’m proud to say that we saved their eyes! Now, poor Marie still has a very weepy eye, but I truly believe she will outgrow it as her immune system develops.

So, that’s been my last few weeks. I get to stay home for October, so I’m expecting to get more kittens soon. Next week, when I’m not as busy with the online class assignments. For now, it’s back to work! Yay!

 

 

Always Improving

I’ve been working hard on the shop. I got the new camera in the mail, so I started working on getting better pictures of my merchandise. I still have a lot to learn about photography, but I did improve dramatically with the better camera. Here are just a few of my new shots:

This was the old “Enchanted Forest”

and these are the new ones:

Closeup

Lead Photo

This was the old “Pacific”

Old “Pacific”

and these are the new shots:

“Pacific” Rolled

Lead Photo

The new shots barely look like the old ones, yet they are the exact same product. I’m hoping these more accurate pictures will help sell the product better. I’m not claiming the photography is great, but it is so much nicer with the extra detail.

I experimented with flash photography and kitten pictures last night as well. Most of these shots aren’t what I want for adoption photos (they need to be looking at the camera because it evokes a feeling that the kitten is looking you in the eye and asking for a home, and some need better focus), but there are some neat effects.

Action shots:

Neat focus effects:

And a really great closeup of Duck’s fur. (This makes a cool desktop background, and I don’t mind if you use it for yourself, so I’ve loaded it in it’s complete size – HUGE! Click to enlarge.)

 Not that I believe this to be an amazing piece of art, but please don’t redistribute the pictures. If you want someone else to see it, link to my page. This is my cat, and I do own the copyright, after all!

I still have a long way to go in the way of taking pictures, but I’m off to a good start!

 

 

 

Never Bored Again

I realized today that, as long as I keep running my own business, I will never be bored again. If I’m not dying, carding or spinning fiber, I am photographing it and putting it online. If I’m not directly making things happen in my shop, I’m reading advice about how to make things happen in my shop. I’m putting up tweets, pins, and Facebook updates. I’ve joined groups on Ravelry that support fiber artists who open Etsy shops of any sort. I have not really stopped working in the last couple of days.

On the bright side, I’m proud of a lot of my work. I’ve made batts that look like these:

(the watermelon batt has been the most popular by far!)

I’ve dyed roving that looks like this:

I spun a skein of yarn:

and I’ve made cat toys like these:

 

These are just a sampling of the work I’ve done. I really need to perfect the photography, but I think I do well considering that I don’t have a fancy SLR camera or particular training in photography (but I do have a dear friend who is a photographic artist by profession, and I suspect she can give me pointers if I ask. She’s been AMAZINGLY helpful with setting up the harder parts of my shop).

In addition to the above work, I’ve also been setting up a business center in the basement. I’ll take a picture of what I’ve got, but it’s going to be a place where the drum carder and dying equipment lives, as well as a place for Michael to put the business supplies for his game.

I plan to make a formal inventory in the next few days, and maybe scan the receipts that I don’t already have in a digital format so I can have accurate books.

I’ve still not sold anything, but I have been getting a lot of views for my shop as I have increased my advertising. I have hope that the first sale will be soon – I’m betting it will be the watermelon batt that goes first. Another friend of mine hasn’t had any sales yet either, so she’s due (she makes baby/child things and blankets). Another friend does very well with her shop (she makes great jewelry, mostly for babies), and she’s had some good advice for me. I’m still very ok with the fact that getting my first sale will take time. I may not feel the same way in another month, but I will cross that bridge when I get there. I plan to do paid ads when I get a hundred different listings in my shop. I have twenty now.

The kittens are growing and doing quite well now that their mother has moved on. Duck has been the best nanny I could ask for – he plays with the kittens and keeps them clean, so they aren’t missing the best parts of their mom.

Buckley isn’t all that visible on the first picture, but I think I will be using the shot of Saxon in the second picture for his adoption photo.

I like this litter because they have a very good herd instinct. If I’m in the living room, the kittens go to the living room. If I go to the kitchen, they follow me there. The greatest part is that when we go into their room, they all come in, waiting for their next meal (and they eat a lot – they’re going through two 12oz cans of cat food a day, which is double what the four of my adult cats eat!). I can shut the door and put them down for a nap with no fuss.

So, yes, I will never be bored again. I will be sick and unable to work sometimes, but I will never be without something to do when I feel up for it.