Expensive plastic bracelets

I believe that I have mentioned before that I don’t have the greatest health. I have many mysterious symptoms that come and go without any rhyme or reason. Doctors often can’t explain major events that have happened to me. I am starting to believe that I am a hypochondriac, despite my many doctors’ suspicions that I am actually not faking anything.

On Thursday, while I was waiting for Michael to come home with the black light, I had chest pains. I’ve had them before, and my endocrinologist thought they were muscular. It’s always just left of the center of my chest and tends to radiate to my left shoulder and back. The thing is, this time, the pain was worse. The first wave hit, and it was pretty mild. I sat here in front of the computer, surfing the internet, waiting for them to go away. Then the next wave came on so strongly I had to call Michael, interrupting a meeting with his boss. He rushed home from work and took me to the hospital, despite my protests.

At the hospital, they tested a lot of things. With chest pain, the first thing they do is an EKG to check your heart. I sat there with little electrodes and sticky conductor tabs on various parts of my body just to hear that my heart was “working great.” The doctor then came in and asked a lot of questions, like “Does it hurt when you breathe in?” and “Does putting pressure on it make it worse?”. The answer to both was no. Actually, the pressure made it better. I was feeling like I should have stayed home rather than wasting money on an unproductive trip to the hospital. Then the doctor said he wanted to do more tests – a CT scan. They hooked me up to an IV, injected contrast dye into my veins, and took a computer aided x-ray. This is in addition to a prior, regular x-ray. Still nothing. Why did I subject myself to this when I was already feeling I wasted my time? Well, the doctor said that there was a chance the this was a pulmonary embolism. Consequences? Death. Since I had a history of this sort of pain before, and asthma, and since I am on birth control pills, this actually seemed possible. One blood clot and it’s all over. Alas, the doctor could find nothing.

After all that, the doctor said that my chest pain was unexplainable and that I should take ibuprofen (a higher dose than the bottle recommends) when I feel the chest pain starting again. I could have done that on my own. So what did I get out of it? Expensive plastic bracelets.

I did manage to come by the black light to check my kittens for ringworm. The brand name on it was hilarious! As for the ringworm? It was just my imagination.


2 thoughts on “Expensive plastic bracelets

  1. Very good title, and well written. This post was shocking to read, and yet engaging.

    I’m sorry to hear that you were feeling so bad and in so much pain! 😦

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